tesla | (no subject)

Monday morning I awoke feeling sublimely peaceful. The dream that had been the catalyst for this was rapidly breaking up and wafting off into the air, so I gathered as much of it as I could, stitched it back together, and carefully laid it in my memory, in hopes of keeping it for later use.

Here's a snapshot of what's left:

I was at Gypsy's sister's wedding. Gypsy wasn't there, but dozens of other members of their family were. Neither the groom nor any of his family or guests were in evidence.

Sarah was, of course, all tulled-up and looking lovely. She wore a traditional white dress with a red velvet sash. Everyone was toasting her and offering their sincere best wishes and love. At one point she was presented with two small gold lockets, which were to become a part of the ceremony. She looked at them and realized that one of them wasn't for her at all, but for me, whereupon I also realized it. She looked my way knowingly, and I suddenly understood that they were from Gypsy.

Somehow in the midst of the festivities, Sarah made her way through to me, and while I hugged her and told her how beautiful she looked, she clasped my hand and secretly let "my" locket fall into it.

She opened hers in front of the crowd - it changed from a tiny gold pendant to become the size and character of a small photo album. It was filled with wee treasures, memories, photos and lace.

As she did so, I crept into a corner and opened mine. It too unfolded into a book, but mine was full of poems and drawings that Gypsy had created for me. And though I can't recall what any of them said, I do remember the spirit of the last page. Though the words said something very like, "To thine own self be true," the meaning came through as, "Do whatever you wish to do - if it is truly what YOU wish - and be happy."

It was a benediction and a prophecy together, and precisely what I needed to hear at that moment. I carried its warmth with me through the rest of the day and I have a feeling that I'll be able to call on it whenever I need it for a long, long time to come.

This is the first peace I've felt in months.